If you've ever used one of those upturned water bottle dispensers they have in offices, when you take a glass of water from it, it gurgles and you can see and feel the water/air movement. Well, thats been the continuous state of my insides for the last 3 days. Not well at all. Shades of the moment in Pet Detective when Carey comes out the door of the shark tank all ripped to shreds, wafting his hands back and forth shouting 'do NOT go in there'. Do not need to go any further down the road to th
well, this is the last night i will have my beloved pc for sometime - tomorrown the removal man comes and takes my link to the virtual world away sniff sniff. Oh god, now i'm going to have to go and get a real life - bloody hell! So to those that have read these entries of mine, i bid you farewell, for the time being anyway.
I read something recently that went something like you are supposed to slide into your grave having lived life to the full, martini in one hand chocolate in the other, shouting 'what a ride!' I feel that I could paraphrase that slightly into how I feel about this year. It feels like it was only last week when I started this blog as a bit of fun and what a journey it has turned out to be, me and my voices..! I read it all the other night when feeling tearful and bleary-eyed in drink. I'm suprise
Countdown is well and truly on now, panic is beginning to set in, and my mind is running wild. Have i sorted everything out? Is the gas/elec/phone sorted, what about post redirection, house insurance ARRRRRRGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! Right, calm it, it's all fine, breathe i tell myself, then i promptly burst into tears - ffs woman, get a grip!
Today was probably the first time i REALLY realised i'm going home. I won't be able to see my friends for much longer, and i'm going to mis
I got some amazing news yesterday. I was shopping in Evans and the mobile went off when i was at the counter, so i answered, as you do and my best mate was on the other end - with the best news ever! She has been picked to be on of the final 5 people to go on Inch Loss Island for GMTV. She beat tens of thousands of people and is in the running for 3 out of the 5 to be chosen by the public to go to Australia in the last 2 weeks of January, for some serious exercising, diet and well being. Whe
ok - so here was i thinking i had bugga all to send home. I cannot believe the crap i have accumulated over the years, so i had to put my smart head on and decide what was to go in the bin, charity or for the removal men. It's quite difficult to shrink the past 15 years of your life into 110cubic feet i can assure you! Next was cancelling the phone, gas, electricity, insurances blah blah blah - here was me thinking again that all i had to do was pack a suitcase and walk out the door -easy pea
I thought i'd start a blog about moving back home and how it affects me. More a virtual diary than anything really, plus anyone who's interested in how i'm getting on can come and have a look.
So - entry no1 - 23 days to go - getting nervous, wondering if i'm doing the right thing after all. I know i am, but i do have worries about starting over again at the ripe age of 32, but if I don't go, i'll always wonder what if i suppose
off-island for 4 weeks for what is hopefully the final round of treatment.
For those of you bored rigid by this blog, I hope you will take up the challenge then and knock this off the top of the list, and do your own. I didn't start this for anyone except myself, and seriously did not expect anyone to read it, beyond those like me with personality disorders to unravel. At a future point when all this is over - God willing - I will print it all off and put it in my child's memory box for w
says the man who has been hopping up and down outside the toilet door directly opposite where I am sitting in the waiting area. Goes in there for a suspiciously long amount of time, comes out and leaves the door open - aaaaaaarghh! Then another bloke rushes in, comes out wiping the sweat off his brow and the first guy rushes back in again. Comes out and leaves the door open again...! Why do blokes do this? Is it a thow back to cavemen days when marking the territory was on the wane socially, b
Last post before the visit to Clatterbridge - sighs of relief all round!Went to the bloods clinic today. Now I try very very hard not to be ageist, being a bit of an old git in training my own self - but hells bells and buckets of blood - i thought i'd wandered up to B&Q on Wednesday by mistake. Even the hand outs you get given have 'old' folk illustrations! I didn't feel young, I just felt sad and tired and irritable. And then one frail ancient lady decided she would get out of her wheelch
I saw her again in Strand Street this lunchtime. It’s all about display isn’t it. Showing off the tattoos and the thong and the baby.
The baby was about to make a noise but she said words on the lines of:
“Shut the f*** up, don’t f****n start or I’ll slap you up the f***** street”.
It did the trick.
In the words of Billy Connolly “Shut your face . . . . and his face was shut”.
But her friends gathered were proud of her. No doubt they too will have their very own bundles of
An update for those people concerned about the progress of the Lounge Lizard. He was seen at a 'do' somewhat tired and emotional, still viewing himself as the Manx answer to Mr D'Arcy, giving the girls the benefit of his greasy chat up lines and was latched onto a couple who clearly wished themselves sat at home with a dose of the clap - or indeed anywhere but stood next to Mr Dickless. Said memberless person had no lady friend with him, which means one woman's life must be so MUCH happier!!
so you have this patient, see? And you have this anxious parent, see? And the patient is running out of drugs....heavyyyyyy ok? So the anxious parent gets patronised by the medic type person and retreats to bunker to restore confidence. Ok so far? Then anxious parent gets call to go get some more drugs, heavyyyyy stuff ok? And anxious parent jumps through increasingly difficult hoops provided by said medic, in order to get stuff for patient... only to find that when parent - now paranoid - ge
So they go to Clatterbridge for the first time and lets just say that it wasn't what you might call one of our best experiences. NHS conveyor belt took over and they were rushed from pillar to post by people who may be in the top percentile of medical skill and prowess but need to take lessons in the meaning of the words 'customer support'. I know people who have had really positive experience of this hospital, but there was little evidence of it on monday's visit. I wont bore you with the det
Very very good news. The 'lump' is down and out for the count!
Only one lot of tablets left to take - the ones you take for gout, bizarrely. The process of weaning off the last of the daily injections is underway and joy of joys is that the chemo line has been removed. We go to Clatterbridge next week to be measured up for the radio and that will begin in about 2 weeks time for 4 weeks. Because of where the radio will be sited, we have been warned of bad sore throats and even a bald patch
Ok folks this is the big one - everything crossed for tommorrow. How effective has the chemo been and how much radio to expect. Now we do have to go to Clatterbridge - the big 'C'. I feel sick with nerves, I've been to the gym, had a healthy salad and not eaten anything remotely bad for me all day but I feel like I just pigged out big time and want to throw up. Drowning in anxiety whilst my alter-ego stands beside me holding out chocolates! (Bitch!). Nails should be down to the quick and are
Title of a bestseller about people on an Island being affected by pollution....possibly..maybe
Another person just a year or so older than my child has just been diagnosed with the same thing. I know what they must be going through and now, I know that others who have been reading this blog know too.
Perhaps I will have company now howling at the moon. I feel for them, I really do.
I am going mad, slowly but shorely, its trooo.... Its not this week, so all those standing by their beds from last week may now stand down - yes that means you too, your maj. A scan here some time this week and then a trip over to LPL. I cant stand the suspense, its driving one completely bonkers. And yours too no doubt! Whenever will she finish, the whinging old bag...I know I feel your pain...
I have taken up health in a big way, joined the gym, tried to diet sensibly and have tonight tr
Saw the happy foreign porter again, had to smile. What an employee! I just visit Liverpool Royal to catch a glimpse of him!I have read so many glossy mags - if you want to know who's doing what to whom and for how long, not to mention how much, whats in and whats out - I'm your woman. It is possible to be so bored your bum goes numb, I can report. Do I care about some bloke caught having it off with the nanny? Do I care about some supermodel caught doing drugs? Not a jot, sorry. Sorry I waste
So they never returned although I see some of them about now and then. The girl with the joint, I see her pushing a pram up Strand Street. Extra extra tattoos an a'.
Baby is always quiet though. Very quiet.
It won't be long before he has his very own baseball cap.
Of course it's nothing new to fight noise with noise, there's even an article about it in this month's Outlook magazine, I see from the forums:
But I don't think I was trying to fight back. I just wanted to share my en
we're on week 11 next week and only one more to go after that, all things being equal, God willing and all that. Then radio at clatterbridge - another new place to take on board. painless but very tiring is the word on the street.Had a bit of a scare last week, suffice to say that damage to nerve endings in your fingers and toes is ALSO a side effect of chemo. have been told that it can take as much as 2 years for the feeling to come back...feeling really dodgy today, going to take to my bed
I'm starting to feel very self conscious about me blog. It was ok before when I knew it was just me and a couple of others reading my stuff. Now I'm feeling a bit exposed. What if someone puts 2 and 2 together and works it out? Not worried for my sake, just my child who has enough to deal with. You might think I have more important things to worry about - and smartypants, yes indeed I do - however some things are beyond my control, outwith the domestic circle etc etc and therefore, in this wom
Went for treatment to Liverpool without us today - one of the hardest things I've ever had to do...let go....and if I find it difficult, heaven alone knows how the huntergatherer is holding up! Waiting for the car to arrive, coming back off the last flight. How did people manage during the war without going completely off their rockers? All that waiting and waiting, must have been like an eternity, but then everyone was in it together in the same boat.....dont know what to do with myself
