I woke again at around 3am this morning; I don’t even bother to look at my watch anymore. What is time all about anyway? There are 24 hours in a day, and the way things are at present, it doesn’t matter how I divide them up. It’s now 9-30am and we have walked Skipper along the Silverburn and had breakfast. The parrot Orry has been bathed and fed. The chickens are all out, watered and fed. The ducks, geese and swans on the river have all been attended to. Nothing has been left to nature or God. Well, not on our patch this morning anyway. God, religion and the afterlife seem to be doing the rounds both in the media and forums at present. During these last few months I have received many emails from wonderful kind folk, some of whom don’t even know me. Yet they have sent me their prayers and have spent much time praying for me. In the last 6 months or so, my situation has improved immensely. I still have a long way to go. However, within me and for whatever reasons a normal health pattern is starting to emerge once again. How much of this is down to Chemotherapy, God or just good luck I don’t honestly know. I don’t have blind faith or set my store in a personal God. Why would God choose to save me or let me off the hook, whilst at the same time allow other more worthy folk than I, linger through a horrible, long and drawn out death.

Why would he listen to other people’s prayers on my behalf, and yet he has received none from me. Well, of course I have absolutely no idea. I only know at present I am getting better but why did it happen in the first place. Didn’t God have any control of that? Was it some kind of test? Had I done something wrong in this life or in some previous life? I don’t know, and unless God tells me I never will.

For me the trouble with religion is, it’s too much like football. Everyone follows their own team. They often only see the virtues of their own team. Even though in many cases they are all playing the same game with more or less the same rules. I was brought up a strict catholic in a convent school. By the age of 16 I was so confused regarding Christianity, I rejected it entirely. The nuns and priests in my convent had read the same bible as the Methodists, born again Christians, Baptists and all the other variations of Christianity that make up the great league of Christian premiership. Yet they had all come to a different interpretation of the same book that their church leaders tell the rest of us, carries a crystal clear message. That is to say nothing of Hindus, Muslins, Buddhists and atheist who all believe in something else. The trouble is, not everyone can be right. However, they all can be wrong. I find it totally inconceivable that, waiting up there is a Christian God or any other kind of God, who is only allowing the people of his or her own faith to pass through. I am reminded of a story that is said to have taken place during the Falklands war. One of the British ships had been hit by an Argentine bomb. Many British seamen were dead and severely injured. As the navy chaplain visited the injured sailors, he came across a sailor he knew to be an atheist. As he approached the injured man, the sailor called out to the chaplain. “You know sir; there is not a great deal of difference between you and me!” “And how do you work that out” asked the chaplain! “Well” said the sailor. Let’s suppose in the World there are at least 100 religions. You as a Christian denounce 99 of them. I as an atheist, simply denounce 1 more than you do.”

For my sins I have given up trying to workout what might follow this life. I am certain that this is not the end though. If when you die, you simply return to dust and push up other forms of life, then life itself is meaningless. I can’t imagine that anyone would go to so much trouble to create such a meaningless and pointless project. I am happy to accept twhatever comes next. My God is simply the boss. I have no idea what my next role will be whether it is up there or possibly down there. I am happy and content that I am going to the same place as you. I might not be travelling on the same road, but bear in mind there is more than one road to Douglas or London or wherever.

I leave you with the words of Desiderata. I first came across Desiderata a couple of weeks before I left the convent in 1969. I found a Braille copy of it tucked away in a small study. After 11 years of brain washing and indoctrination, I discovered quite by accident, on one sheet of paper, all I needed to know, to give me peace of mind. So far it has served me well, even through these most testing times.

Desiderata

Go placidly amid the noise and haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence.

As far as possible, without surrender, be on good terms with all persons. Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even to the dull and the ignorant, they too have their story. Avoid loud and aggressive persons, they are vexations to the spirit.

If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain and bitter; for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself. Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans. Keep interested in your own career, however humble; it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.

Exercise caution in your business affairs, for the world is full of trickery. But let this not blind you to what virtue there is; many persons strive for high ideals, and everywhere life is full of heroism. Be yourself. Especially, do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love, for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment it is perennial as the grass.

Take kindly to the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth. Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.

Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be, and whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace in your soul.

With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world.

Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.

Wouldn’t the World be a far nicer place in which to dwell, if all the religions therein could learn to be neighbourly and tolerant towards each other. Isn’t that what most of them preach. But then the theory was always the easy bit. The practice is a very different matter.

Until tomorrow then. This is Tom Glassey. News at 11-20. On the banks of the Silverburn River