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[BBC News] Manx citizenship test introduced


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And what if they fail? Nothing. If you pass, what do you get? A visa or a work permit? No. So what's the fecking point?

 

I'm sure all the Philipinos and Sith Ifricans will be queuing up to spend 50 quid of their hard-earned cash to get a poxy certificate.

 

And why only non-EU citizens? Are Poles more Manx than Ukrainians?

 

:rolleyes:

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And what if they fail? Nothing. If you pass, what do you get? A visa or a work permit? No. So what's the fecking point?

 

It almost sounds like it's more an empty gesture to those who oppose further immigration than it is about those actually immigrating.

 

On the other hand, everything can be solved with tests, tests and powerpoint slides. Scientific fact.

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And what if they fail? Nothing. If you pass, what do you get? A visa or a work permit? No. So what's the fecking point?

 

I'm sure all the Philipinos and Sith Ifricans will be queuing up to spend 50 quid of their hard-earned cash to get a poxy certificate.

 

And why only non-EU citizens? Are Poles more Manx than Ukrainians?

 

:rolleyes:

 

As the UK government has introduced this citizenship thingie the Manx authorities have no alternative but to follow.

 

The interesting thing is that it cannot apply to EU citizens as they can't be discriminated against by the UK (and hence Mann)which begs the question how the Residence Act (if it ever becomes law) will be able to apply to them either ?

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oooo ace..... can we speculate what the questions might be???

 

I'll start with a few:

 

 

1) When is there a boat ?

 

2) Who appeared 154 times in one edition of the Courier in fishnet tights?

 

3) How many Manx people does it take to change a light bulb ?

 

4) What is meant by the phrase "alright yesser" ?

 

5) How much money have you got in the bank ?

 

others?

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It's much simpler than that! Just fill in the correct missing words and read them out loud as you do so:

 

1. I think ….. one item missing from the list. (there’s/their’s)

2. I saw …. Sparrow on the garden fence. (a/an)

3. The gravy is poured from a gravy …. (boot/boat)

4. In autumn, the ground is often covered by …… (leaves/leafs)

5. Daily newspapers are published ….. day. (every/Christmas)

6. We always have a good breakfast in the ……. (mourning/morning)

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Manx Citizenship test:

 

1. If an event is due to start at 2pm what time do you need to arrive?

 

ans. About 4.30pm, time enough fella.

 

2. If you are traveling North what direction is it?

 

ans. Down, everywhere is down.

 

3. How many to the nearest 10 million does the IRIS project cost (bonus mark for naming which century it will eventually be finished)?

 

ans. A very big number (and the year 3456).

 

4. Do you know how to drive around a roundabout?

 

ans. No, I can barely drive and when I do it is at a max speed of 20 mph.

 

5. Do you want to live in an overpriced cardboard box sized flat?

 

ans. Yes please I would like 2.

 

6. Do you believe in fairies (but you'd better not be one)?

 

ans. Yes (No and you will be cursed with bad luck).

 

7. What is a reasonable price to travel to the Island?

 

ans. 250 quid by plane 50 quid by boat as long as the journey takes a decade and has a 50% chance of sinking.

 

8. Manx Radio represents good value for money because?

 

ans. I have no idea.

 

9. How many I's in the word film?

 

ans. 2 - filim.

 

10. Will you vote for a bunch of clueless butchers and bakers who mismanage public funds, vote themselves massive pay rises, and are in the pocket of certain companies?

 

ans. If yes welcome to the Isle of Man.

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