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Michael Jackson Suffers Cardiac Arrest


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ah right now I get it....michael jackson fucks kids....thats hilarious....your humour is too subtle for me

 

Thanks for pointing that out WSAG. I can hardly type this whilst rolling around the floor in a fit of hysterics.

 

Do you think he/she made it up themselves or nicked it from some other website? - sorry stupid question really

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A British General makes a press release to the Peel City Grunaid denying rumours of his recent decease...

 

Source:- WWW.PeelCityGrunaid@Govvags.com

 

"Rumours of my death are exadurated" says former British Army Chief

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Sir Micheal Jackson yesterday, appearing very much alive and well

 

General Sir Michael "Mike" Jackson, GCB, CBE, DSO, ADC Gen made a press release yesterday denying recent rumours of his death.

 

"The recent rumours of my death have been exadurated. I am happy to say that during the last few weeks I have been absent from the country on Military Business, and not dead despite what the international media have been claiming..

 

My wife appreciated the messages of condolences, and I will be sending the funerary wreaths to the tomb of the Unknown Soldier as I think he has more need of them than I at the moment. The funeral + memorial service has been cancelled. The wake however will still be going ahead as planned, and if any mournful friends have any recollections about 'good old Mike' then I would be more than happy to hear them.

 

Could I take this opportunity to ask if anyone requires a coffin at short notice as I have one going spare at the moment? Pop into my offices at Whitehall and ask the sentry on the gate (the guy dressed in green holding a rifle) if you can chat to Mike, and I will pop down and show you it. I was looking for about £200 for it but we can haggle. I am afraid the gun carriage is not for sale though as that is only on loan to me. "

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It is pretty shit.

 

That's what I was going for. It was my entry into a deliberately awful poetry competition a few years ago, I call it "Tickle me Emo". Obviously it needs changing to reflect the past tense but that would mess with the structure and rhythm.

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I saw a special Michael Jackson commemorative magazine on sale at Nobles this morning.

I found that slightly amusing.

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We all knew it:

 

http://www.michaeljacksonhoaxdeath.com/

 

http://www.michaeljacksonsightings.com/

 

I mean - you can clearly tell it's him, right?

 

mjbytrashcan.jpg

 

Actually, Some say that you never see Michael and La Toya Jackson together and that they are one and the same person, and at the memorial service you never saw all of La toya's face.

 

Personally, I think he is the Stig!

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