Daddy?

[ButterflyMaiden]

my mother had an affair with ny dads best friend for an uncertain amount of time, safe to say, though, that it was long enough for this "friend" to have possibly sired me or my brother.

 

dont like thinking about it, and ive never raised the subject with my dad. it'd possibly destroy him.

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Could I just say I think you are really brave to have posted that.

Thank you ever so much

[theintelligentthug]

my mother had an affair with ny dads best friend for an uncertain amount of time, safe to say, though, that it was long enough for this "friend" to have possibly sired me or my brother.

 

dont like thinking about it, and ive never raised the subject with my dad. it'd possibly destroy him.

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Could I just say I think you are really brave to have posted that.

Thank you ever so much

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erm, thanks. i dont necessarily think im brave, its just thats what happened in my life.

 

you gotta "cope", man. "if you didnt laugh, youd cry".

[Lonan3]

First thought (apart from the old saying about it being 'a wise man indeed who knows his own father') is that the Jewish way of determining a person's 'Jewishness' from the female, rather than the male, line seems to make a lot of sense.

Ultimately, however, I would say that even the biological ties take second place to having been brought by a loving and caring father. In my case, having been fostered and never having met my 'natural' father, I have no hesitation in saying that I regarded my foster father as my 'Dad' to the very end of his days and, having held his hand in his dying moments, knew a love for someone that no biological connection could ever surpass.

[Addie]

In my case, having been fostered and never having met my 'natural' father, I have no hesitation in saying that I regarded my foster father as my 'Dad' to the very end of his days and, having held his hand in his dying moments, knew a love for someone that no biological connection could ever surpass.

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Gosh, that was beautifully put.

 

Posted by some else Yesterday, 07:10 PM

 

my mother had an affair with ny dads best friend for an uncertain amount of time, safe to say, though, that it was long enough for this "friend" to have possibly sired me or my brother. dont like thinking about it, and ive never raised the subject with my dad. it'd possibly destroy him.

You're being very brave and protective. Love is all that matters anyway, isn't it?

[theintelligentthug]

In my case, having been fostered and never having met my 'natural' father, I have no hesitation in saying that I regarded my foster father as my 'Dad' to the very end of his days and, having held his hand in his dying moments, knew a love for someone that no biological connection could ever surpass.

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Gosh, that was beautifully put.

 

Posted by some else Yesterday, 07:10 PM

 

my mother had an affair with ny dads best friend for an uncertain amount of time, safe to say, though, that it was long enough for this "friend" to have possibly sired me or my brother. dont like thinking about it, and ive never raised the subject with my dad. it'd possibly destroy him.

You're being very brave and protective. Love is all that matters anyway, isn't it?

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i dont think im being protective or brave. my dad knows it went on, i know it went on, so does my bro. we just dont gotta talk about it.

 

yeah love is all that matters, coz when all said and done, my dad raised me, regardless of who sired me.

 

and anyway, its not a definite, its just a possibility.

[nipper]

[pontiuspilot]

i guess they didn't do there research in peel, the rate would be a lot lower than 25

[Lonan3]

i guess they didn't do there research in peel, the rate would be a lot lower than 25

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I understand that there were an unusually high number of bakers there - at least, I think that's what was meant by so many people being 'in bread'?

[Barby]

i guess they didn't do there research in peel, the rate would be a lot lower than 25

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I understand that there were an unusually high number of bakers there - at least, I think that's what was meant by so many people being 'in bread'?

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and all those buns in ovens

[Jacqueline]

Yes. Muffins has got a lot to answer for.

[StuartT]

First thought (apart from the old saying about it being 'a wise man indeed who knows his own father') is that the Jewish way of determining a person's 'Jewishness' from the female, rather than the male, line seems to make a lot of sense.

Ultimately, however, I would say that even the biological ties take second place to having been brought by a loving and caring father.  In my case, having been fostered and never having met my 'natural' father, I have no hesitation in saying that I regarded my foster father as my 'Dad' to the very end of his days and, having held his hand in his dying moments, knew a love for someone that no biological connection could ever surpass.

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In pictish society as well, the line of inheritance was matriachal - the reason being you could prove who your mother was, but not necessarily who your father was.

[Gladys]

That's interesting Stuart, I thought it was only a Jewish bit of pragmatism. Are there any other examples of this?

 

There was an interesting docu. on TV recently which explored female promiscuity throughout the animal kingdom demonstrating that it is the quest for the "best genes" which drives the female, more than the male, to have mutliple partners to secure the genetically strongest offspring. This was antipathetic to the socal mores of Darwin's time (and possibly now) which is possibly why the historic subjugation of females.

 

I'm not a strident feminist, more a believer that our natural evolutionary blueprint dictates more than we accept, and perhaps these more ancient civilisations naturally understood better the natural drivers behind our behaviour.

 

Going back to the theme of the thread though, the contributors who have had real experience of this uncertainty bear out that after nature, it is nurture that has the upper hand!

[matty]

T Shirts for Peel kids???