Meary Veg Sewage Treatment Works - Whats Going On?

[jkmanx]

anyone seen the short snippet in the examiner about the sewage treatment plant (IRIS scheme). Whats going on??? Are we paying for another blunder or is this just a technicality?

 

_______________

Quote from the Examiner

 

Confusion reigns over the transfer of the Meary Veg sewage treatment works from contractor Charles Brand Ltd to the Department of Transport.

General Manager of Charles Brand, Philip Bentham, said the company had completed its main works on the plant - barring some continuing contractual work obligations - and said it would be in the DOT's hands by the end of last Friday.

But alister Burroughs, of Burroughs Stewart Associates, the consultancy firm employed by the DOT to oversee the IRIS project, said the opposite.

'The plant has not been formally handed over today (Friday),' he said.

The treatment works is part of the IRIS scheme infrastructure.

 

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[Lonan3]

I think they're still trying to solve the problem of it hitting the fan so often and with such stunning accuracy!

[TheScope]

I think they're still trying to solve the problem of it hitting the fan so often and with such stunning accuracy!

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

 

[TheTool]

Technically this is a stealth c*ck up, nobody has even moaned about it.

 

The worst thing is a certain contractor who has been doing certain works has constantly been doing sub standard work but the government still pays lol.

 

The shake of a hand is a powerful thing.

[Celt]

Charles Brand Ltd screwed us over the breakwater scheme so why do you think anythings changed ?

 

Apart from the Ltd that is.

[Chinahand]

I'll probably get sued / banned ... but its brilliant so what the heck!!

 

I cannot claim any credit for this what so ever ... it arrived via the wonders of email.

 

From Meary Veg to Thie Veg

 

Now the folks of Ballabeg drink an awful lot of tea,

But they never have been able to have a public pee,

So the Commissioners decided they would see what they could do,

To keep the people happy they would build a public loo.

 

Now the job they had in mind, in a simple quiet location,

Was just a little hut, with a toilet and wash-basin,

So they put it out to tender to obtain the lowest bid,

And from Dan Kinvig they got a quote, of around three hundred quid.

 

Now Dan's bid was accepted and the work it soon commenced,

But Tynwald got to hear of it and rather took offence,

Its seems they found a problem with the planning application,

And the loo did not comply with all the modern regulations.

 

So the Commissioners handed over, to the MHK'S.

Who promptly decided the project must be phased.

So Dan Kinvig was summoned and told to sod off home.

And consultants and lawyers, from London in were flown.

 

Now the consultants did a survey and from that they did decree.

To comply with project Iris they would need a lot more pee.

So new plans were instigated and the draft was soon made final.

To make it EEC compliant and build a larger grand urinal.

 

So surveyors came from England and structural engineers.

Lunatics and odd balls with all their daft ideas.

They submitted their quotation, then ran away and hid.

As their estimate reached Tynwald, for sixty million quid.

 

That's fine of course said Tynwald, its well within our budget.

And even if it wasn't, one of us would fudge it.

The plans were duly passed and commissioners were heard to cry.

"We didn't want a toilet, 14 stories high."

 

But Tynwald was unmoved and set about the job.

Of building in the village a multi storied bog.

A building firm was sought, the size of the Armada.

And a contract was drawn up and awarded to Dandara.

 

Petitions started raining in, for there was much disquiet.

And the quiet folk of Ballabeg rose up and caused a riot.

The MHK'S held meetings to think the matter through.

And decided it was best if Douglas got the loo.

 

So new plans they were drawn and more consultants gathered.

And to the sixty million quid, several naughts were added.

But Douglas didn't want it, they said they would get by.

They didn't need a ****house, not 14 stories high.

 

Now 50 years past by, and not a brick's been laid,

The MHK'S still meet and the consultants still get paid.

The MHK'S are busy, we know not what they'll do.

And the folks of Ballabeg, they got a cheaper loo.

 

For a hut was built by Dan Kinvig for the folk of Ballabeg.

At the bottom of his garden, they've got a nice Thie Veg.

He didn't use consultants, to build his little loo.

Or spend sixty million quid, just a trip to B and Q

 

[This post is a p*ss take and does not mean to offend any large, powerful litigious individuals!]

[cheesemonster2005]

I'll probably get sued / banned ... but its brilliant so what the heck!!

 

From Meary Veg to Thie Veg

 

Now the folks of Ballabeg drink an awful lot of tea,

But they never have been able to have a public pee,

So the Commissioners decided they would see what they could do,

To keep the people happy they would build a public loo.

 

Now the job they had in mind, in a simple quiet location,

Was just a little hut, with a toilet and wash-basin,

So they put it out to tender to obtain the lowest bid,

And from Dan Kinvig they got a quote, of around three hundred quid.

 

Now Dan's bid was accepted and the work it soon commenced,

But Tynwald got to hear of it and rather took offence,

Its seems they found a problem with the planning application,

And the loo did not comply with all the modern regulations.

 

So the Commissioners handed over, to the MHK'S.

Who promptly decided the project must be phased.

So Dan Kinvig was summoned and told to sod off home.

And consultants and lawyers, from London in were flown.

 

Now the consultants did a survey and from that they did decree.

To comply with project Iris they would need a lot more pee.

So new plans were instigated and the draft was soon made final.

To make it EEC compliant and build a larger grand urinal.

 

So surveyors came from England and structural engineers.

Lunatics and odd balls with all their daft ideas.

They submitted their quotation, then ran away and hid.

As their estimate reached Tynwald, for sixty million quid.

 

That's fine of course said Tynwald, its well within our budget.

And even if it wasn't, one of us would fudge it.

The plans were duly passed and commissioners were heard to cry.

"We didn't want a toilet, 14 stories high."

 

But Tynwald was unmoved and set about the job.

Of building in the village  a multi storied bog.

A building firm was sought, the size of the Armada.

And a contract was drawn up and awarded to Dandara.

 

Petitions started raining in, for there was much disquiet.

And the quiet folk of Ballabeg rose up and caused a riot.

The MHK'S held meetings to think the matter through.

And decided it was best if Douglas got the loo.

 

So new plans they were drawn and more consultants gathered.

And to the sixty million quid, several naughts were added.

But Douglas didn't want it, they said they would get by.

They didn't need a ****house, not 14 stories high.

 

Now 50 years past by, and not a brick's been laid,

The MHK'S still meet and the consultants still get paid.

The MHK'S are busy, we know not what they'll do.

And the folks of Ballabeg, they got a cheaper loo.

 

For a hut was built by Dan Kinvig for the folk of Ballabeg.

At the bottom of his garden, they've got a nice Thie Veg.

He didn't use consultants, to build his little loo.

Or spend sixty million quid,  just a trip to B and Q

 

[This post is a p*ss take and does not mean to offend any large, powerful litigious individuals!]

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

 

That's absolutely class! I've pasted it in again in case the original gets deleted (although if that happens this'll probably disappear too - damn!)

[Lonan3]

Can't see any reason for banning that - it's just a piece of very good satirical writing that comes uncomfortably near to the truth!

[FCMR]

Charles Brand Ltd screwed us over the breakwater scheme so why do you think anythings changed ?

 

Apart from the Ltd that is.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

 

 

I can rember a poster some time ago saying the the treatment plant was a mess but got rubished over it.

And yes CB have been screwing subbies as well as government